I have spent the past two years searching for My Thing through this blog. I think I may have found it.
In hindsight, it was pretty much staring me in the face the whole time. Yup, I know. I can be a bit thick sometimes. So while I may never write the great Canadian novel, I think it’s safe to say that my creative outlet is putting pen to paper. Or perhaps fingertips to iPad would be more appropriate.
There I said it. I love to write.
Some of the most satisfying moments in the past months have been the ones just after hitting the publish button. It’s an odd rush of “Yes, I’m done” and “Wow, I finished another one”. It’s interesting to see how my writing style changed over the months. My first couple of posts were pretty wordy and involved long descriptive paragraphs. The later ones are a bit more choppy. I’m not sure if it’s just how my thought process changed or if realized that it was just easier for people to read it that way. Whatever the reason, I have enjoyed every minute.
But I’m not going to lie. I have wished, more than a few times, that more people read my posts. That’s when my most trusted adviser gently reminded me, that wasn’t why I was writing. I was writing to explore my life and express myself. (Ya, I know, sometimes I expressed myself a little too much) But it felt good. It felt right. So I kept doing it.
Oddly enough, since having this epiphany about writing being my thing, I’ve been stuck with no ideas and nothing flowing in my head. I started numerous post but never got past the first sentence. Panic started to set in. What was happening?
Some would call it writers block. I call it damned annoying.
And worst of all, I just couldn’t figure out why. It was infuriating and caused hours, perhaps days, of gut wrenching soul searching. (Okay, a bit of an exaggeration). I tried to work through it by spending some time drinking wine in Whistler and heading out for numerous runs. Trying to nudge the process along. I was willing to do whatever it took. I’m dedicated that way.
But then I remembered that this was something else that I’ve learnt these past two years.
Everything comes when it’s supposed to. And it did.
I realized that the time I have spent with friends and acquaintances in the past two years learning about them, and in turn me, has been enlightening and rewarding. Not to mention a lot of fun. I’ve seen what it means to be passionate about something. Truly passionate. I’ve been given advice and I’ve give some out myself. I’ve rekindled friendships that had faded and realized that people I hardly knew were wicked interesting. Despite already being middle aged I’ve grown up.
But here’s the kicker. Now that I’ve come to this momentous conclusion, I’m feeling like I need a change. Don’t worry, I’m still interested in exploring the Best Things in Life. I just think that it may look a little different.
I’m not exactly sure how…..but that’s the Best Thing in Life. You don’t always know what’s around the corner.