A Slow Ride Home – “Tales from the Momside”

traffic jam

“Okay, that was our last stop.  Ready to go home?”

“Ya.  I’m hungry and tired of shopping. ”

A morning of last minute Christmas errands was finally finished.  Three malls, numerous toy stores, one very crowded book store and some serious sugar cookie bribery has tired her eight year old out.  As she pulls out of the covered parking lot the rain starts again.  Great.  Traffic is chaotic and people are doing stupid things in an effort to get home quickly.

“Can you put the radio on?”

As she flicks on the radio the dj is right in the middle of the traffic report.  Apparently there is a massive accident on the bridge and their only route home is a total parking lot.  Awesome.  As she maneuvers onto the highway and into the mass of cars a little voice comes from the back seat.

“Mom I have a question.”

“Okay, but make it a good one.”

The truth is her daughter never has just one question and she has occasionally had to limit her barrage of wonderings.

“If you are gay can you have a baby?”

“Yes.  And no.”

“What?”

“That’s two questions.”

“Mom.”

Crap, she thought maybe she had an out with that one.  No such luck.  More cars are merging into the already packed lanes and if she doesn’t pay attention somebody is going to try and sneak in front of her.

“Okay, so two women, or two men, can’t physically have a baby together.  Remember we talked about how a baby is created by an egg from a woman and sperm from a man?”

“Right.”

“Well a gay woman would need some help from a man.”

“Help?”

“Wow, I suck at this.” She thinks.  Isn’t there some great way to use the traffic they are stuck in to explain this?

“A women would need to get some sperm from a man before she could have a baby in her tummy.  Once the baby is born then the other mommy could adopt the baby as their own too.”

“But what about a man?”

“Well a man could asks a woman if she would have his baby and then he and his partner could adopt that bay.  Does that make sense?”

“I guess so”

Empty silence.  Beautiful empty silence.  How long would it last?  As long as it took to get to the off ramp?

“Do gay people get divorced?”

“Sure, if they aren’t in love any more.”

“Is that why you got divorced?”

“That’s one of the reasons.”

Damn that was too open ended.  Hoping it wouldn’t result in more questions on that subject, she quickly asked her what she might want for dinner when they eventually got home.  Wow, nice deflect?  Nope.

“Will you and Daddy ever get divorced?”

“Not planning on it.”

Could this traffic go any slower?  If she could just get across the bridge and to the first exit ramp they would be home free.

“Did you have two weddings?”

“Yes, but when I married your dad it was just him and me and your brother on the beach.”

“Hmmm.”

She sneaks a peak in the rear view mirror and her daughter is gazing out the window with that look on her face.  This conversation is not over just yet.

“But you still had a wedding dress?”

“at the beach?  Yes.”

Her daughter perks up.

“Cool.  You got two dresses?”

It’s taken over an hour for them to get home and after a discussion on babies, gay marriage, gay adoption, marriage and divorce it all boils down to one thing.

She got to wear two wedding dresses.

She is clearly the parent of the year.

Liebster Award

liebster

To top off my best blogging month ever,  a couple of days ago Jim at HealthWealthLife101 nominated me for a Liebster Award.  I did a little research on this award just to understand it a bit better and this is what I found out.

The Liebster Award: The Official Rules

So, not being a person who typically breaks the rules, I am going to do my best to comply.

Firstly, I would like to thank Jim for nominating me.  It’s was very kind of him so please go check out his blog.  HealthWealthLife101

Second,  I will answer Jim’s questions.

  1. How long have you been blogging? – one year
  2. Do you have other blogs that you would like to share? – nope
  3. What state or country do you live? – Vancouver, B.C., Canada
  4. What do you sometimes dream about? – Finding My Thing
  5. Do you collect anything as a hobby? – no. well……no
  6. What you blog about, is it your passion? – mostly it’s about other people’s passions
  7. Do you feel like you are a good friend? – I am an awesome friend
  8. Do you use any other social media tools? – Twitter, Facebook and Instragram
  9. Do you enjoy what you do? – I love my life
  10. Do you do a lot of traveling, and if so where have you been? – no, but I hope to
  11. Do you recently take the Blogging 101 course? – no I have not

Now I need to nominate six bloggers.

Writing For Myself

Jennifer’s Journal

Peonies and Petulance

Positively Unbroken

Edwina’s Episodes

And finally, ask them some questions.

1. What state or country do you live in?

2. What is the best thing about where you live?

3. What is your passion?

4. How do you relax?

5. Vanilla or chocolate?

6. Favorite vacation spot?

7. Favorite band?

8. Why do you blog?

9. What was the last book you read?

10. Weirdest thing you have ever eaten?

Done!